


Mistaken

by Joeanthur



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: M/M, Minor Character Death, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-11-27
Updated: 2013-11-27
Packaged: 2018-01-02 18:34:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,236
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1060149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Joeanthur/pseuds/Joeanthur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Arthur has a crush on Merlin and mistakes his kindness for requited love. He then proceeds to convince himself that he and Merlin are in a relationship, when Merlin doesn't feel the same.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mistaken

I don't know why I was getting so worked up. Merlin was my manservant, a lower class citizen, and here I was nearly obsessing over him. He was a smart ass with a side of occasional jerk, not to mention a boy, so why I liked him was a mystery to me. Seeing him made my heart race and talking to him gave me goosebumps. Every time our hands accidentally touched or he helped me with my armor I would get butterflies and blush. It was getting ridiculous. It was just a stupid crush. I could get over it with time. I sighed as I sat down to eat. My father was staring me down. It was making a little nervous but I wasn't going to show it.

            “What?” I ask finally, wanting to know why he felt compelled to watch me eat.

                        “You seem upset.” His stare was relentless.

            “I'm not.” I snap before taking a small bite.

                        “I'll have Gaius take a look at you.” He stopped staring and started eating, but I knew the conversation was far from over. I pushed my food away.

            “I'm not hungry.” I get up to go back to horse riding, but my father stopped me.

                        “Go see Gaius. Now.”

            “I don't need to” I roll my eyes and cross my arms across my chest.

                        “I wasn't asking. Go.”

            I didn't want to but I knew better than to defy my father, so I went to see Gaius. I knocked on his door and Merlin answers instead of Gaius. I could feel my heart take off and my palms get sweaty. My face felt hot and I hoped that Merlin didn't notice.

            “I-I came to see Gaius.” I stuttered embarrassed. Merlin nodded and let me in. I tried to get away from him best I could so I could calm down. Gaius appeared to be making dinner for Merlin and himself. 

            “What seems to be the matter?” He asked putting down the ladle.

                        “I haven't been feeling my best. Loss of appetite.” I wasn't sure of what to say exactly. Nothing was wrong with me I just liked Merlin.

            “You look fine to me. Are you sure nothing else is wrong?” Gaius went back to working on dinner and seemed uninterested. Merlin on the other hand was watching me with concern.

            “Nope. I'll be off.” I left as quickly as I could but Merlin stopped me at the door.

                        “Come back after dark.” He whispered into my ear before pushing me the rest of the way out the door. He shut the door and I could tell I was blushing terribly. I took a deep breath before making my way to my room.

            My thoughts were racing nearly as fast as my heart was. Did he like me back? Did he know I liked him? What if he was angry! I took another deep breath. Freaking out was not the healthy thing for me to do. I laid on my bed and stared up at my ceiling. I went through sword-fighting techniques in my head. Jab. Turn. Switch. Swing. It was all so easy, so natural. Before too long I had completely calmed down, and it was close to dark. I got off my bed and stretched.  It was still not quite dark, too soon to go back to see Merlin. I frowned and looked around. I decided to go back to my horse and ride around for a while. I was about to get her suited up when Merlin showed up.

             “Where were you going?” He asked smiling.

                        “Just for a ride to pass the time.” I looked away from him and made it look like I was busy.

            “Well you can come by now if you want. Gaius turned in early.” Merlin suggested and I nodded. He led the way back to his room.

“So what's going on?” I asked him. I was very curious as to why he wanted me to come back.

                        “We need to talk. What's been been going on with you? You've been acting weird, and then you came to see Gaius today. I'm  worried about you.” Merlin looked at me and I could tell he was seriously concerned.

            “It's no big deal. I only came earlier because my father made me.” I sighed and looked into Merlin's eyes. He was staring back. I held my breath and went for it. I kissed him. And he kissed back for a moment. It was the most amazing feeling I had ever experienced. His lips were soft and smooth against mine and I could feel my heart swell with excitement. I put my hand behind his neck and pulled him closer. Merlin stiffened, but I was too far gone to notice. I was in heaven. I couldn't stop it was as if I was eating for the first time in weeks. I was so wrapped up in the kiss, I didn't notice Merlin trying to back away. And if I did notice, I didn't care. After this kiss I couldn't stop grinning. This was it. Merlin was mine. I finally had the man I wanted after what seemed like so long. I hugged him and took a deep breath, breathing him in, even though he mostly smelled like sweat. I lightly bit his neck.

            “Mine.” I whispered before recapturing his lips in another kiss. He didn't kiss back at all this time. I broke the kiss and hugged him one last time. “I'm going to go get some sleep. See you tomorrow Merlin.” I kissed his cheek before heading back to my room. When I got back I laid down on my bed, a smile staying on my face. I ran the whole scene through my head over and over again. It was perfect, the way his lips felt against mine. Sure Merlin was hesitant, but I convinced myself that he was only nervous. A guy like him probably never had someone interested in him, guy or girl. I was ecstatic. I had him. He was mine. I smiled again. Tomorrow I would ask him to spend the night with me. It was far too soon for sex, but cuddling and kissing all night sounded like the best idea in the world. Being next to Merlin all night...just thinking about it made me shudder. I couldn't think of anything better. I fell asleep completely at peace.

            I woke up to Merlin standing at the foot at my bed. “Good morning sire. It's time to get ready for the meeting.” I groaned and sat up. I smiled and kissed his cheek.

            “Good morning babe.” I got out of bed and undressed. I expected Merlin to at least try and sneak a peek at me, but he didn't even try to look. I was slightly disappointed. I had hoped he was as interested in me as I was in him. I was dying to see what he looked like under his clothes. I imagined him to be skinny, but slightly muscular. I had to stop myself before I got myself in a situation.

            The meeting was dull and turned out to be simple negotiations between my father and another  question.  I missed Merlin. Though he was right behind me, I couldn't kiss him or hold him like I wanted to. After the meeting was sword-fighting practice, then target practice, and by the time I was done with today's activities, it was nearly dark. I went in search of Merlin to ask for him to stay the night with me. I found him at the stables, shoveling manure. He was only half-way done. I picked up another shovel and did what he was doing.

            “What are you doing?” He asked bitterly.

                        “Helping.” I smiled at him. I hoped he wasn't angry at me.

            “I can take care of it myself.” He sounded displeased, almost fearful.

                        “I want to help. I was hoping that you'd spend the night with me. I figured since we don't get much alone time together during the day, so at night we could cuddle or just talk. Whatever you want to do.” I kissed his cheek before continuing to shovel. Merlin didn't say anything, but didn't stop me.

            After we had finished, I led Merlin up to my room. He was obviously nervous, so I didn't look at him as he changed even though I desperately wanted to.

            We climbed into bed together and I snuggled up against him, putting an arm around him. He didn't move at all.

            “Goodnight Merlin.” I whispered into his ear. I fell asleep like this, holding Merlin.

 

            When I woke up Merlin was no where to be found. Throughout the entire day I never saw Merlin. Both Gwen and Morgana had seen him. I was beginning to fear that he was avoiding me. I couldn't think of any reason why he would avoid me. The past few days had been the best I had ever had. Being with him this way was magical. I went to my bedroom at the end of the day and waited and waited and waited, but Merlin never came. I decided instead to go to his room. His bed was smaller, but that just meant we would be closer together.

 

            Gaius answered the door instead of Merlin. “Yes?” The way he said made it seem as if he couldn't fathom why I would be there. Merlin must not have told him.

            “I'm here to see Merlin.” I could feel my heart swell at the thought of him. I couldn't stop smiling. I must have looked like a fool. Gaius was about to say something when I saw Merlin coming out of his bedroom. I gently pushed past Gaius and went and hugged Merlin. It was so good to see him after not seeing him all day. I realized just how much I missed him.

            “I missed you.” I whispered into his ear. I didn't want to make our relationship obvious to Gaius if Merlin hadn't told him.

            The look on Merlin's face was pure terror. I didn't know what Merlin was so scared of. Gaius was like a father to him and would accept him no matter what.

            “Merlin whats wrong?” I asked quietly. Gaius left the room, I assumed to give us some privacy.

                        “Why are you doing this? What do you want from me?” He asked, looking at the floor. I didn't understand. I was speechless. He rolled his eyes at me. “Just leave me alone ok?” I frowned. I was so confused.

            “Are you mad at me?” I gently held his hand and looked at him, waiting for an answer. Merlin sighed before shaking his head no and pulling his hand away from me. I let out a sigh of relief and smiled at him. “Good.”

            Merlin went back towards his room and I followed him. His room was an absolute mess, but that didn't matter to me much. I got into his bed and scooted as far over as I could so we would both fit. I knew he told me to leave him alone, but whatever he was going through, it was nothing a good cuddle couldn't fix.

            “What are you doing?” Merlin asked harshly. He sounded annoyed.

                        “You never came to my room so I came to yours since I didn't get to see you all day. I missed you.”

            Merlin sighed and seemed very tense. I was beginning to worry, but then he got into bed next to me. I snuggled up against him, holding him like I did last night.

            “I didn't realize this was going to be a permanent thing.” Merlin sounded defeated. I didn't understand him at all. Any girl here would be lucky to have my attention and here Merlin was with all of my affection, and he acted like it was a burden rather than a blessing. Yesterday he was kissing me back and going along with everything and now he was resisting. I was so very confused.

            “Of course its permanent. You're my boyfriend now.” I smiled. Merlin. My boyfriend. It was beautiful. Perfect. I tightened my grip on Merlin and kissed his forehead, and his response was to turn his back to me. I moved my arms to around his waist and pulled him closer. I left one hand on his hip and used my other to explore his back and shoulders. He was more muscular than I had imagined, but it was sexy. Even though I couldn't see it, I moved my hand to explore his chest. It was difficult  with Merlin facing away from me, but it still was wonderful. All of him was just so attractive. I had expected Merlin to want to touch me too, and explore my body like I was to him, but he was still.

            “Is something wrong?” I was very worried. Was he actually angry about earlier and just not telling me? Merlin just shook his head and he turned enough to look at me. I took this opportunity to kiss him. He kissed back this time. I held him closer and put my hand on his chest. His heart was beating solid and strong. It was comforting to have him this close to me. It wasn't long after that I was asleep.

            Merlin wasn't there when I woke up. Again. I sat up. I got out of his bed and went into the main room where Merlin was sitting and eating with Gaius. I imagined all three of us sitting for dinner, talking and laughing. I could imagine Gaius as my father-in-law and I hoped one day he would think of me as his son-in-law. Gaius seemed surprised to see me. Merlin hesitantly waved at me and I waved back before quickly leaving. I had another busy day ahead of me.

            Merlin helped me from time to time, but not as much as usual. He must have been busy with Gaius. His schedule was often as full as mine.

            “Arthur!” Gwen yelled to stop me while I was on my way to bed.

                        “Yea?” I asked turning around to face her.

            “Is Merlin ok? He's been acting weird.” My eyes widened. Should I tell her? Was something really wrong with Merlin?

            “I have no idea. What do you mean?”

                        “He's just been acting different.”

            “Well...we've started dating recently. Maybe that has something to do with it. I expected her to hug me, saying she was happy for us, but instead she looked as though she was going to cry.

            “Oh. Good luck.” She pushed past me and though she tried to hide it, I could tell she was upset.

                        “Gwen!” I called out to her, but she just kept on going. I sighed. I would have Morgana talk to her. She would figure out what was going on. 

             I found Morgana in her room, looking out the window.

 

                        “Morgana?” I called her name and the look she gave me told me she was angry with me.

            “What do you want?!” The way she said it was bitter, and full of disgust. I didn't understand why she was so upset with me.

                        “What's going on with everyone? You're pissed at me, Gwen nearly cried and Merlin isn't acting like himself. Am I the only one who isn't going crazy around here?” I sat down and sighed. “I just want to know why everyone is acting different.”

            “Arthur...you can't just take what you want and expect there to not be consequences.”

                        “I don't understand. What are you talking about?”

            “People aren't something to play with, so stop trying to mess with Merlin!”

                        “What does this have to do with Merlin and I? I'm not playing with him. We're together. He's my boyfriend. I'm not playing with anyone.”       

            “God you are an idiot!”

                        “What is going on?”

            “Ask your boyfriend how he really feels about you.” Morgana spat as she turned back around, so I took that as a signal for me to leave.

            I sighed, slamming the door as I left. Maybe Morgana had a point. I should ask Merlin how he feels about me. Perhaps he loved me. The thought got my heart jumping again. That would explain why he was acting weird. He could be afraid to show it. Maybe he thought I wasn't as serious about us as he was.

            All I had to do was talk to him and set things straight. Then we'd be happy. It was late now and I didn't want to bother him. Tomorrow we would talk and I would have a normal happy Merlin.

            That morning the palace was abuzz with some sort of tragedy.  Finally I found my father.

            “What's going on?”

            “Morgana's handmaiden committed suicide. It's no big deal, but all of the servants are very upset. You might want to check in on Merlin.” I stared at my father shocked. How could he act so calmly?

            “Gwen was very important, don't treat her as though she isn't.” I said through my teeth as I began to walk away.

            I found Merlin standing with Morgana in the hall. I rushed to catch up to them. I hugged Morgana, then Merlin. Merlin flinched slightly, as though he was afraid of me.

            “I heard about Gwen what happened?” I asked, keeping a hand on Morgana's shoulder.

                        “Just stop! Stop acting like you care! You're nothing but a brat! Gwen died because of you, this is all your fault! Why won't you just open your eyes and just stop...” Morgana trailed off.

            “I don't understand.” I looked at Morgana confused. Morgana pushed past me.

                        “Merlin.” I looked to see if anyone was around, and we were alone, so I felt comfortable holding his hands in mine. “We need to talk. I know it's probably a bad time with Gwen, but how do you feel about me? Honestly.” I looked into his eyes. His eyes widened and he looked away.

            “What do you want? Why are you doing this? I just want to be left alone.” Merlin pulled his hands away.

            “I'm so confused. Merlin, I love you, so it's ok if you love me back.”

            “Love you? Arthur, you've been pushing me around since I got here. I can't stand your arrogance. I don't want to be anywhere near you. I just want to know why all of a sudden you're forcing me to be with you like...like this. You make me sick. At first I considered us friends, but after all you've done the past week I don't want to see you ever again. I thought we were friends." Merlin shoved me, but not hard. "Just leave me alone."

            I stood there in shock. "No you don't understand. You led me on, I thought you liked me! This is your fault not mine!" I backed away from Merlin.

            Merlin snorted. "Of course. Of course you're going to say that. You know what? Screw you. You are the reason Gwen is dead, you've ruined my life, and I'm just so sick of your crap! You took advantage of me as your servant. The only reason I put up with it was so I wouldn't lose my job. You are so selfish and self-centered."

            I tried to reach out to Merlin but he just shoved past me. "I thought you loved me."

            Merlin turned back to me. "You were mistaken."


End file.
